Intrusive Partners Elusive Mates

Author: Stephen J. Betchen
Publisher: Routledge
ISBN: 1135404232
Size: 67.83 MB
Format: PDF, Kindle
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When two people form a relationship or marry, they begin to move towards one another with the expectation of closeness. The emotionality or intensity that accompanies this process, however, may result in fusion followed by a desperate need for space or distance. Intrusive Partners - Elusive Mates is the first book to deal exclusively with the pursuer-distancer interaction, and to focus significant attention on the emerging male pursuer-female distancer dynamic. This book revisits Fogarty's work, traces the concept over time and across different professional fields, and discusses in detail the concepts correlation with gender issues and social change. A detailed, step-by-step model of treatment to aid in de-escalating this potentially problematic style is also offered. The model in and of itself is unique because it integrates psychoanalytic conflict theory and psychodynamic systems theory into one treatment approach. This book is intended to offer the therapist a model for understanding and effectively discussing this dynamic, while at the same time allowing couples to read and explore it on their own.

The Solo Partner

Author: Phil DeLuca
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781570901591
Size: 77.15 MB
Format: PDF, ePub
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Based on successful methods used for years by a marriage counselor in his clinical practice, this book offers practical advice and effective techniques to get relationships back on track. "It is possible to heal your relationship without the help of your partner, " says the author, and this book, illustrated with real life examples of the dynamic struggles and processes of relationship in crisis, shows how. The book, called "a breakthrough for couples in understanding the dynamics of power struggles in relationship, " by psychotherapist Carolyn Bushong, teaches the reader how to shift interaction from a destructive to a healing mode, how to keep from being blamed by your partner, and how to prevent the frustrating cycle of pursuing and distancing that so many couples fall into. Included are detailed questionnaires and worksheets to help the reader understand relationship dynamics and identify the best healing strategies. DeLuca, a marriage counselor and family therapist, addresses the problem of noncooperation by one partner in a relationship and provides advice for overcoming obstacles by concentrating on the one partner who recognizes the problems and is motivated to conquer them. "How could I teach a couple to resolve their problems when one partner refused to acknowledge a problem existed -- let alone discuss it?" he asks. This work, the result of the author's 25 years experience in marriage and family counseling, answers that question.

Magnetic Partners

Author: Stephen Betchen
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 9781439109540
Size: 34.27 MB
Format: PDF, ePub, Mobi
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Do you and your partner argue about the same things over and over again? Are you often confused about why your partner is so angry with you? Are things getting worse and worse even though you’ve tried everything you can think of to make them better? In this breakthrough guide to repairing romantic relationships, therapist and marriage researcher Dr. Stephen Betchen presents a powerful new explanation of what leads to this kind of escalating conflict in couples and how you can repair your relationship and find a whole new level of happiness. Based on his extensive experience as a couples’ therapist, Dr. Betchen has discovered that the prevailing idea that opposites attract is wrong. Instead, one of the strongest forces that attracts people to one another is that they share a hidden, inner conflict in their lives—an unconscious struggle within themselves that each of them developed growing up—which he calls a "master conflict." The fact that a couple shares a master conflict acts as an almost magnetic force of attraction, but, over time, master conflicts often begin to push a pair apart—many of the very things you most appreciated about each other start to grate on you, producing increasing hostility. The good news is that by identifying the master conflict that you share, you and your partner can take the steps to break the cycle of fighting and come to a new place of understanding and happiness in your relationship. Often, just the realization that you have this hidden conflict acts as a powerful cure, allowing you to appreciate each other once again and to be empathetic about the things that have been irritating you both. From his years of work with couples, Betchen has identified the nineteen most common master conflicts—such as getting your needs met vs. caretaking; giving vs. withholding; commitment vs. freedom; power vs. passivity—and for each he provides vivid stories of couples who have struggled with them, as well as simple tests that help you to: • Identify the core master conflict that is causing your relationship problems • Understand the origins of your conflict and how it drew you to your partner • Diagnose how the conflict is now pushing you apart • Come to new terms with the conflict to save your relationship As Dr. Betchen writes, knowledge of a master conflict is power, and Magnetic Partners is an empowering guide that will help you not only to identify and control your master conflict, but also to bring your relationship to a new level based on deeper understanding, ultimately leading to greater fulfillment and long-term resilience. Partners

Working With Relationship Triangles

Author:
Publisher: Guilford Press
ISBN: 9781572301436
Size: 15.14 MB
Format: PDF, Kindle
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Virtually all significant relationships are shadowed by a third party-another person, a competing distraction, or even a memory. This groundbreaking book provides clinicians with a hands-on guide to working with many different kinds of relationship triangles in therapy with families, couples, and individuals. The authors show why triangles come into being, how to predict their evolving nature, and how they can be dealt with and resolved in treatment. A wealth of clinical case material and treatment suggestions illustrates how thinking in terms of threes, as well as individuals and dyads, can greatly increase therapeutic flexibility and effectiveness. The paperback edition includes a new series editor's note by Michael P. Nichols.

Desire Desirability

Author: Alison Poulsen, Ph.d.
Publisher: Createspace Independent Publishing Platform
ISBN: 9781542768788
Size: 31.54 MB
Format: PDF, Mobi
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Whether you are the Pursuer desiring more intimacy or the Distancer seeking more autonomy, "Desire & Desirability" gives you insight into the dangers of the Pursuer/Distancer relationship pattern and the tools to break free of it. When Pursuers seek too much connection or attachment, Distancers feel smothered or trapped. When Distancers feel too much pressure for togetherness, they become anxious about losing their freedom and their sense of self. Ultimately, when pushed too hard for increased connection, Distancers often withdraw from the relationship leaving the Pursuer feeling rejected or heartbroken. To sustain a mutually-fulfilling relationship, the first step is knowing how to change your own behavior to transform the relationship dynamic. Real-life examples illustrate ways to transform desire based on need into desirability based on fullness. The examples focus primarily on couples in loving relationships but the principles discussed hold true for all types of relationships including parents and children, co-workers, and friends. The strategies in this book will empower you to achieve a more sustainable and happier relationship based on mutual desire.

Rekindling Desire

Author: Barry McCarthy
Publisher: Routledge
ISBN: 1135919291
Size: 20.62 MB
Format: PDF, Kindle
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For over a decade Rekindling Desire has helped to restore and restructure sexuality in thousands of lives. This expanded edition continues the exploration of inhibited sexual desire and no-sex relationships by respected therapist Barry McCarthy, who brings decades of knowledge and the expertise that comes from having treated almost 3,000 couples for sexual problems. Contained within are suggested strategies and exercises that help develop communication and sexual skills, as well as interesting case studies that open the doors to couples’ sexual frustrations. The shame, embarrassment, and hesitancy that individuals feel with themselves, and the resentment and blame they can feel towards their sexual partners, are explored and put into context. Whether you are married, cohabitating, or dating, or if you are 25, 45, or 75, reading this book will help renew your sexual desire and put you on the path towards healthy, pleasure-oriented sexuality.

The Ethics Of Interpersonal Relationships

Author: Robert Firestone
Publisher: Karnac Books
ISBN: 1855756056
Size: 69.19 MB
Format: PDF, ePub, Docs
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Author, artist, and clinical psychologist Robert W. Firestone and collaborator Joyce Cattlet dig deep into the psychology of destructive behavior--both its source and how it manifests itself in personal relationships between men, women, couples, and families, and in the social arena. They posit that if we can understand the source of aggressiveness and learn to cope with the urges it impels, we can better rear future generations and improve mental health practices in general. This position offers a hope of altering what many people consider to be humankinds's basically unethical nature.

Master Conflict Therapy

Author: Stephen J. Betchen
Publisher: Routledge
ISBN: 1351751093
Size: 69.15 MB
Format: PDF, ePub, Mobi
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Illustrated with case studies, this book teaches couples and sex therapists the comprehensive, integrative treatment approach of master conflict therapy (MCT), which combines psychoanalytic conflict theory and Bowen Theory with the basic principles and practice of sex therapy. MCT suggests that each partner has an internal conflict born out of their experiences from their respective families of origin. Partners then choose one another based on these conflicts, and it is only when they are out of balance that the couple experiences symptoms. The authors help clinicians treat couples through providing them with a solid theoretical foundation, a practical assessment procedure, and highly effective treatment techniques to re-balance a couple and, in turn, alleviate their sexual symptoms.

Handbook Of Lgbt Affirmative Couple And Family Therapy

Author: Jerry J. Bigner
Publisher: Routledge
ISBN: 1136340327
Size: 28.76 MB
Format: PDF
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The editors and contributors of this comprehensive text provide a unique and important contribution to LGBT clinical literature. Spanning 30 chapters, they discuss the diverse and complex issues involved in LGBT couple and family therapy. In almost 15 years, this book provides the first in-depth overview of the best practices for therapists and those in training who wish to work effectively with LGBT clients, couples, and families need to know, and is only the second of its kind in the history of the field. The clinical issues discussed include • raising LGBT children • coming out • elderly LGBT issues • sex therapy • ethical and training issues Because of the breadth of the book, its specificity, and the expertise of the contributing authors and editors, it is the definitive handbook on LGBT couple and family therapy.

Women With Attention Deficit Disorder

Author: Sari Solden
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781887424059
Size: 27.87 MB
Format: PDF, ePub
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Solden, a therapist with ADD, combines the real-life histories and treatment experiences of women with ADD with the latest clinical research and literature to create a new screening checklist specifically for women. She highlights the special challenges women with ADD face, describes what to look for in treatment and counseling, and outlines three steps for living with ADD. Photos. Line drawings, charts.